Today’s thought from Hazelden is:
Have you ever been around people pleasers? They tend to be displeasing. Being around someone who is turned inside out to please another is often irritating and anxiety producing.
People pleasing is a behavior we may have adapted to survive in our family. We may not have been able to get the love and attention we deserved. We may not have been given permission to please ourselves, to trust ourselves, and to choose a course of action that demonstrated self trust.
People pleasing can be overt or covert. We may run around fussing over others, chattering a mile a minute when what we are really saying is, “I hope I’m pleasing you.” Or, we may be more covert, quietly going through life making important decisions based on pleasing others.
Taking other people’s wants and needs into consideration is an important part of our relationships. We have responsibilities to friends and family and employers. We have a strong inner responsibility to be loving and caring. But, people pleasing backfires. Not only do others get annoyed with us, we often get annoyed when our efforts to please do not work as we planned. The most comfortable people to be around are those who are considerate of others but ultimately please themselves.
Help me, God, work through my fears and begin to please myself.
Read over these statements to see if they apply to you under some circumstances:
- I try to be who someone wants me to be.
- am afraid to rock the boat.
- It is hard for me to know what I want.
- I avoid speaking my mind.
- I find it easier to go along with what someone wants or with their opinion.
- I fantasize about a strong person taking over my life and making it work.
- It is hard for me to express my feelings when they are different from someone I’m close to.
- It is difficult for me to say No.
- I avoid getting angry.
- It is hard for me to take initiative.
- I try to be nice rather than expressing how I really feel.
- I want everyone to get along.
If any of these statements are true the consider reading more:
New Hope Al-Anon
401 S. 11th, St. Joseph Missouri
December 9, 2015
Wednesday – 5:30 to 7:30 PM
First time ever speaker’s meeting representing four 12 Step Programs.
AA – Angi A
GA – Shirley M.
NA – Sherri C.
Al-Anon – Dora J.
Speakers begin at 6:00, each speaking for 20 minutes.
Festive spirit and snacks provided
Please join us at this unifying event
New Hope Al-Anon
Special Holiday Speaker’s Meeting
When: December 17, 2014, 6:30 PM
Where: 401 South 11th
Speakers: Linda C. – Al-Anon
Bill P. – AA
Cookies and Punch shall be served.
Please come and enjoy the fellowship.
New Hope Al-Anon began last January with one meeting a week. We now meet Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 5:30 PM. This past month we have been actively working to create a new fresh look for our meeting room.
This room restoration was completed with Al-Anon labor and material donations. Some serious elbow grease coupled with positive enthusiasm saw the job through.
For those unfamiliar with Al-Ann – it is a program for the families of alcoholics. At present all of New Hope Al-Anon meetings are open so we do not exclude the families of other addicts.
Here are a few photos of the completed room:
The New Hope Al-Anon Family Group began having meetings at the Alano Club of St. Joseph in January of 2014.
The group began in January and now meets three days a week:
Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 5:30 PM
401 South 11th.
Entrance is from side door on Sylvanie Street